what are you doing here

What brought you here?

The valley never ceases to amaze me.

This morning I went right to the top of our land where the original Blaenant Ddu Reservoir would have started. And because I had moved a buildup of twigs and leaves from the water-gate earlier in the week, the brook was forging a significantly new course.

It looks so different. Instead of a broad stony bed, there’s a narrower, deeper stream carving into fresh bank. Each thread of water chiselling away the soft earthy clay, leaving some of the original bed nearly a meter high.

I was not expecting this!

Walking with the dogs having fed the junior boys, I was trying to collect my thoughts for this post. It has been a full-on week and the thread of clearing away to realise where we are was on my mind.

I’d been thinking about comments attributed to Michelangelo. “Every block of stone has a statue inside it and it is the task of the sculptor to discover it… it is already there, I just have to chisel away the superfluous material.”

This also reminded me of Martha Postlewaite’s poem, Clearing, I shared several weeks ago.

And the question I wanted to pose was: what brought you here?

What did bring you here, today? And what brought you to where you are in your life right now?

What I do know is that we’re not some random collection of atoms aimlessly bumping along in the universe!

We are on a journey and the question is: where are we today and what are we doing here?

Embracing the space

Sometimes the way we discover this is only through chiselling away. Letting go of our layers, the things that have misshaped us over the years. Being prepared to be vulnerable to who we are and what makes us unique.

When I started musing on finding our true voice earlier in the year, we’d already gone through phases of chipping away. The notion of ‘less is more’ is OK with me and I know the power of creating space to see more clearly.

Yes, it’s not a cosy, comfortable place. I feel exposed and sometimes wonder if I have any real substance at all. Will there be anything left after it’s all stripped away?

But I know there is. And I know there is in you too – your unique, beautify and transcendent ‘voice’. That ‘speaks’ things – in whatever way it’s ‘heard’ – that no one else can.

That ‘voice’ is developed through walking and letting go. Walking through things that will release the space for us to practice and try out who we are.

My ‘clearing’ continues to have unexpected dimensions. And although some of these are completely left-field (I’ve just been diagnosed with a very rare form of breast cancer) walking through them is teaching me that what is inside is stronger than what buffets me. I just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other and be present to each day.

Choosing hope

I can choose hope, not in my circumstances, but hope that I have a role to play in “the ongoing creation of the world”.

And every step of the way requires my honesty and trust that I have something to contribute that needs to be heard. Even if it sounds squeaky or off-key to me…

Whatever brought you here today, I hope you leave with a sense of hope that where you are is no accident and you have something to say…

May your whole life be a prayer.

And may you be honest with God

as you are more and more open to your role

in the ongoing creation of the world.

Rob Bell, NOOMA: Open

1 thought on “What brought you here?”

  1. What brought me here? Powerful observations and questions that have enabled me to see the path connecting my visit to The Waterside with my reading of Brene Brown’s work on vulnerability. My own current clearing away is a preparation for new levels of self reflection and honesty as to where I lost my own voice.
    Thank you Sue.

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